1. When Chuck Norris was born the only one who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris 😉
2. When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
3. Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn’t built up the courage to tell him yet.
4. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that’s why there are no signs of life.
5. Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn’t dead it is just afriad to move.
6. Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
7. Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
8. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
9. Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn’t nearly foolish enough to attack him
10. Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattle snake…….. After three days of pain and agony ………………the rattle snake died
11. Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
12. Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
13. Chuck Norris once throwing a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded